Defining "Gay"

Once again, I must profess my hatred for semantics; or, rather, I must profess my hatred for those times when a person who utterly lacks semantics unwittingly punches a hole in their reasoning skills because they do not understand how context works.

Instead of defining "atheism", I shall be defining "gay" this time around.  The adjective "gay" has four accepted definitions:

1. sexually attracted to a person of the same sex; homosexual
2. lighthearted and carefree; happy and exited
3. very bright in color
4. foolish, stupid, or unimpressive

Now, here is the main point of this entire article: at no point in using the word "gay" will you ever invoke every one of its definitions simultaneously.

A Lesson In Context

Whenever you hear a person speak, it is important that you are aware of the circumstances or situations that gave rise to the idea, event, or statement in question.  When you read a passage, it is important that you have also read the passages that immediately precede and follow the words or passages you are currently reading in order to understand and clarify the meaning of your selected text.  When consider a word, such as "gay", with its surrounding words or circumstances, you are taking that word in context.  When you ignore the surrounding words or circumstances, you have taken the word out of context, and therefore the meaning of the word is not fully understood.  Taking the word "gay" out of context is why so many people wantonly get upset when they hear it spoken aloud.

For example, let's say I declare, with a grin on my face, that "I am feeling gay!"  A person who understood what I said in context will understand instantly that I am feeling lighthearted or happy.  They will also understand that I am not saying that I am feeling stupid, or homosexual, or bright in color.  They would see my smiling face, hear the excitement in my voice, and understand with the utmost comprehension that in this context, "gay" means "happy".

Another example: let's say I want to buy something nice to treat myself, but later realize I lack the funds to do so.  In my frustration, I might remark, "Aw man!  I don't have enough money.  That is so gay!"  I ask you, would it make any shred of sense to conclude that I must be referring to this situation as being homosexual in nature?  The correct answer is no: it would make no sense to infer that I am using "gay" in any way other the intended meaning—the context in this case being "stupid".

The problem is that there are people on this earth who are quite neurotic and frankly inept at understanding things in their proper context.  These hypersensitive individuals erringly conclude that when I refer to something as "gay", I must be referring to that something as being homosexual, regardless of the context.  They then go on to insinuate that by doing so, I am somehow indirectly insulting every homosexual on the planet.

Two words: utter nonsense.  No one is being insulted.  You are simply choosing to be offended.

I cannot stress enough how important context is, and how often reasonable human beings take it for granted.  As individuals and intellectuals, we really do have a responsibility to educate ourselves thoroughly and properly, because our stupidity cannot just harm us.  It can also harm others.

Youth ages, immaturity is outgrown, ignorance can be educated, drunkenness can be sobered, but stupid lasts forever.     —Aristophanes